When it comes to facing an unplanned pregnancy as a couple, many men we see tell their partner,
“I’ll support whatever you decide.”
While a lot of guys think this is what she wants to hear, this is not always the case.
Even if it’s not what you mean sometimes what she really hears you say is:
- “It’s your problem, not mine.”
- “I don’t want to be involved in this.”
- “I’m unprepared and unwilling to deal with this.”
- “You need to take care of this yourself.”
- “I don’t care if you have an abortion.”
- “Our future together is not important to me.”
- “Our child is not important to me.”
Real support is being there for someone when things get tough, even if it gets messy. This means being willing to research and explore all options with her and work through what each of these options would mean for your relationship and for your future. It can be a tough choice between parenting, abortion, and adoption.
Being there for her means so much more than being “neutral” about the decision. It means being physically and emotionally present for her if that’s what she wants.